cold and hungry, looking for love

hoping a miracle could be sent from above

tired aching born to a world of despair

hoping there are heart out there that actually care

sitting on the streets cause there’s nowhere to stay

being walked by, day after day

laughing people pass me by

sorrow, grief, just about to cry

then i see a hand reach out

a helping hand?! I so graciously shout!

no, it was my ticket to hell

this is the beginning of the story i tell

of how that was the top of my life, now i fell

he’s working me so hard i could yell

i cry everyday, thinking of how better life would have been

if i dint run away and not be seen

they beat me!, im nine!

but life then compared to now was perfectly fine

its like im enclosed between 4 walls

HELP! i scream

crying on my bed wishing it was only a dream

close my eyes, pinch myself

look at the picture i once called myself

i smiled

while reminiscing the past

i cry

hoping this life wouldn’t last

atlast!

my hope is here

the police is finally here

im saved!?!

no, im put for adoption

hes put in jail

for slavery

i feel no better

i get adopted, again and again

each time a different pain

wishing i could see the face of my creator

instead now like i was not even created

so many faces

so many places

so many fears

so many tears

i was adopted about 70 times

now im thinking adoptions a crime

because each time

gets worse and worse

one day im treated like a horse

the other worse

i cant take it!

until..

i find the one parent

that treats me like a child

I finally feel… safe

poor, but safe

for the first time in my life, i felt… a warm fuzzy feeling, whats it called,love?

im 15, now living a happy life

due to lack of feeding, i look like a twig

wearing a wig

due to lack of education

i am not smart

i start school

im know as “uncool”

thats fine

i can do with a little verbal abuse

now im being shoved into lockers

i thought i had escaped the physical abuse

i feel like… no use

they tell me im ugly

they tell me im dumb

i start by pricking my thumb

it takes the heart pain away

then i go to my room and just… lay

cutting myself now, i think it feels.. good

next day at school, we are asked general math knowledge

multiplication

due to lack of education

i dint follow

my head was hollow

i sit staring

not caring

not hearing what has to be said

in my head

everyone was dead

i hear shouting now

its my name

they tell me to go…

die?

i start to cry

i run away

they dont know my past

the agony was too much

i cant take it

i cut myself more

now i feel sore

how am i going to end this never ending pain

im gonna end the pain by… ending my life

i grab a knife

hold it to my chest

a tear drop falls

i look out the window

watching my life replay

all that pain must END today!!!

piercing through to my heart

bye bye world, its been a disaster

and that is.. my happy ever after.